Thursday, June 16, 2011

… and wearing my favorite high-heels by Anna Yamchuk

The sessions we had on the 10th of June were probably ones of the most interesting sessions since the beginning of the program. 
Our day started with a visit to the Human Rights Defender’s Office, where we discussed a very important issue: defending human rights in Poland with legal means. I had read a lot about the work of Ombudsman in Ukraine, and I was very excited that I actually got an opportunity to talk to people working in the Ombudsman’s office here in Poland, who shared their experience and knowledge with us.    

Our next session was dedicated to the women’s rights and I want to tell a little bit more about it, as I have always been particularly interested in this issue.

We spent much time talking about the equality of rights of women and men. On one hand, that sounds obvious for me because since my early childhood I have been brought up as an independent, strong, and persistent girl who has all necessary abilities to make my dreams come true. On the other hand, I understand that this basic principle of equality of rights is perfect just on paper, and when it comes to implementation, a lot of problems appear. One of these problems is connected with a physical factor that distinguishes men from women– women are granted with the gift to give birth to a child. This is our huge privilege, but at the same time, women meet many obstacles on their way because of this present from the Nature. 

For example, it is unfair that an employer would not want to hire a young woman under the presumption that she will leave her job in a year or two in order to focus on her private life. Unfortunately, such situations do happen in many countries. At the same time, an employer most likely would not like the idea of hiring a woman with a gap in her professional CV (a gap which appeared because she was at home raising her child). A woman must prove: ‘I am still good enough!’ Charlotte Whitton once said “Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult”. Well, I agree! 

These labor equality issues are not the most serious ones when it comes to gender discrimination. We talked a lot about problems such as rape crimes, domestic violence, and the like. It is already terrible that such crimes happen, but what is more shocking is how our society treats victims and perpetrators. If a woman is raped, it is believed that it happened because she was most likely wearing too short a skirt and because she behaved in a way which allowed a man to assume he was given allowance to do whatever he wanted with her. “He is just a man after all”. This reminds me of words of prof. Monika Płatek. In her speech, given during the conference we visited on Wednesday, prof. Płatek stressed that the education on rape prevention should focus on men, the potential perpetrators, not just on women, the potential victims. Of course, I don’t think that it will solve the problem, but at least an essential step ahead will be made.

Furthermore, if a woman wants to make an abortion, even if it is legal, she is perceived by some as an irresponsible killer of the unborn child. Moreover “this unwanted pregnancy” is often believed to be the woman’s fault for she should have thought about consequences before she slept with “a first coming stranger”. Now it is her own responsibility and she should bear the consequence of what she did.  
If a woman becomes a victim of domestic violence, she will probably remain silent and no one will ever know what happened to her. She will just be ashamed presuming that it is all her fault. Indeed, she might have done a better job at home, and perhaps her husband has a right to be angry … 
May be I am exaggerating a little bit, but it seems to me that it is pretty much a situation in Ukraine. And I don’t think that we are “unique” in these terms.  Girls are taught from their early childhood that they are future wives while boys are taught to make a career and that girls should be good wives. I believe that the problem of protection of women’s rights starts with the lack of proper education and self-estimation. But we are a new generation and hopefully we will see this world differently. I believe that changes will come! 

The topic of women’s rights is a very broad one and I am only able to tackle on few issues. And due to its scope and complexity, it is impossible to come up with a fast and general solution. 

Yes, it is not easy to be a woman: “a mother, a wife, a daughter, a professional”. I just wonder: shall I ever manage to be this “4 in 1”? Well, I believe that God would not have created me a woman if I had not been good enough to cope with all of this. So yes, some day I will manage it somehow, just being myself and wearing my favorite high-heels.